Michael C said (December 7, 2015):

Even among church goers, and Christian colleges you will find varying degrees of desire to follow godly living. I think it's important to know that moral standards, and the idea of marriage came form God. They are not just made up ideas. Commitment and love of God are the foremost comfort. Inspirational lives of others who lived in ungodly times and stayed true to the Lord are throughout the Bible. Godly friendships are important. Perhaps others of like mindedness can be found within groups like Campus Crusade for Christ on her campus.

Finding a good supportive Bible believing church nearby can offer support. Time in prayer and in the Word of God can certainly help. Righteous Lot chose to live within the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, but he he was vexed because of its wickedness. He and his family were saved from its destruction; Jesus referring to the event as fact in the New Testament. Jesus referred to days preceding his return as similar times, such as Lot and Noah. Stay true to the Lord and true to your convictions, and be encouraged, others have gone through and are going through similar.
through and are going through similar.

GT said (December 6, 2015):

Just want to add my voice to those encouraging Eli.

She writes, "I've been told by my peers that it doesn't matter if you have sex multiple times with different men before marriage."

This has been proven false. See, for example, this:
http://socialpathology.blogspot.co.uk/2010/09/statistical-adjustments-to-promiscuity.html
To quote:

"What this data shows is that sexual partner count is a *very good* -- in fact uncannily good -- predictor of the risks of divorce.

How good? One extra partner in a woman is equivalent to negating the protective benefit of greater-than-high school education in a woman, two partners equivalent to having a poverty affected marriage, ten or more partners negates any benefit of income or education with regard to marital risk."

And, in the comments section:

"I've done a short non systemic literature review and young man/woman wishing to make a name for themselves in psychology would have the field wide open to themselves. It seems curious though, for the limited number of papers that are out there, nearly all point to the fact that high partner counts increase unfaithfulness. No one seems to have asked, why?"

...We know why, in our sick, sex-saturated age, nobody wants to ask why!

So, Eli, stick to your guns. The sluts who try to shame you into being a slut yourself are lying to you and don't care two hoots about your future happiness. Just as drunkards like to bully people into getting drunk with them, they just want everyone to be in the same rotten boat as they're in themselves.

Pre-marital promiscuity (particularly for women) destroys the chances of having a stable marriage -- stay chaste and try to find some proper friends who don't try to manipulate you into doing things you hate.

Chetsy said (December 5, 2015):

Hi, Eli, stay true and you will be rewarded greatly not only in the next life but in this one too. Living well is the best revenge--not that it's about putting anyone else down. But your peers will feel it when we fast forward x number of years later, and you will have the satisfaction of knowing you didn't denigrate yourself; they'll eventually come to their senses either through a broken heart, bad education, bad health and (yes) low self-esteem knowing they didn't take the high road.

There was so much good advice and encouragement from the previous posters.

No one who stays true to God is ever put to shame. My advice is to get involved with the pro-life movement, your church, mentoring or some other worthwhile activity you believe in.

I lived some of your angst but stayed a virgin for my marriage, and I am so happy I did. It makes you stronger and makes for a much better marriage. Stay true to God and to yourself.

Susan said (December 5, 2015):

Eli, I have an 18 year old son who refuses to go to college for this very reason. He'll take classes here and there, but he's not interested in "the college experience"; it actually disgusts him. He works instead, and I suspect it will serve him well in the long run.

Not from lack of opportunity, he is still a virgin and plans on staying chaste until marriage. We are LDS ("Mormon"), but even if we weren't, I think he'd still see the wisdom in this road and choose it, unpopular or not. His father and I have raised him to respect even those who don't respect themselves, and to treat his own body as a temple of, and a gift from, God. Sex is a blessing, a sacrament, for procreation and pleasure, within marital bonds.

Chastity and modesty are no longer valued, but they are valuable virtues nonetheless. Only fools do not see this...and it's too bad we are surrounded by fools. To me, it's just further evidence that we're in the latter days. It's a lonely time, but you aren't alone.

Monica said (December 5, 2015):

This article was consoling, to say the least! My gainfully employed, financially secure 20-something son is in the same boat, trying to find a traditional Catholic girl who wants to be a wife and mother.

Sadly, we have found most so-called Traditional Catholic girls have bought into a modified version of feminism - get a career (with the excuse it's because you can't find a traditional young man) then spend lots of time traveling and pleasing yourself, spending every dime you make on whatever tickles your fancy.

Around age 30, complain more loudly you couldn't find a nice young man and continue with the same lifestyle! Oh find me a virtuous woman, her worth is greater than pearls!

Proverbs
We'd love to hear from real Catholics who have daughters who don't want a career and a life of narcissism! They are a rare gem indeed!

Horst said (December 5, 2015):

WHAT A LADY !!!!!
Eli, you are a rock and you are purity = a rock of purity.
Any real man would and will cherish you.

Yvonne said (December 5, 2015):

Eli hang on to that ‘on-the-outside-looking-in’ sensation. It means you can still think for yourself. That was me some years ago and looking back now it kept me from repeating the mistakes I saw others making with life-long consequences.
I would also add, keep a guard on your comments to your ‘friends’.....your scruples repeated to others may make you a target....
Not to alarm you, but Sin hates such a contrast as yourself.
Please stay safe.

Marco (age 24) said (December 5, 2015):

I just have to look at the photo of this article to know what it is about, and I don't have the heart to read it at the moment. I'm pissed off. I work my ass off everyday, get treated like garbage, suffer and struggle to make living, while these other young people have the time of their lives while being propped up by government subsidies for their education. I didn't have to go to 'school' to learn how to work. I didn't sign up for sex and partying after high school, I learned to work.

But what are these young people even doing? They aren't even learning how to work, they are just into getting drunk, playing video games, getting high, and having sex.
Absolutely disgusting, and then they think they are intelligent and look at people who didn't go to school as uneducated. They walk around town prim and proper in the latest trendy clothes and hairstyles and they think they are alive.

They aren't alive, they are spiritually dead. I doubt very many of them even come out of college still believing in God, let alone loving Him. Because when you are 'intelligent' and 'educated' (educated by Marxists) you realise science and atheism is the latest trend, and these people are slaves and followers of trends, they never think for themselves.

I doubt they even have much compassion or wisdom, because how can you have compassion or wisdom when you never suffer anything, and just fill your life full of booze and sex.

I really don't understand this generation at all, and they don't understand me.

Thank God.

Eli said (December 4, 2015):

Eli--Your "innocence" is your communication with your true self. Those who follow the crowd lose contact with the unique person they come into the world as. You will find, if you haven't done so already, that your "innocence" is the source of your strength. Those around you who are into dissipation are indeed dissipating themselves; the term is appropriate. Many of them even lose the ability to relate to the uniqueness of every child--although sometimes having a child come into their lives can beneficially jolt them back from their sybaritic path.

Look at the faces of the young people in the "orgy" scene, They have ceased to be individuals and are absorbed by a phenomenon of mob psychology, lost in a group.

Surely Satan can have no greater pleasure than seeing people choose to extinguish their own character. And of course it is also looked on favourably by financial and political Establishments, which abhor (indeed, cannot contend with) ethical individuality.

Swamikan Raja said (December 4, 2015):

I am an Indian based out of Mumbai - a traditional Christian and a regular reader of your website. I am a software professional.

I was pleasingly surprised to read an article written by a young American lady who is following a traditional Christian way of living, not giving in to pressures of this satanic world.

What I liked the most is that this lady is seeing the degradation first hand. Here in India, tons of ladies are going the fabricated new world way - wanting to have so called economic & family independence - a reason why I was never able to find a girl friend or have a successful marriage.

-

JJ said (December 4, 2015):

Ever notice how everything "intellectual" and "secular" results in nothing but the lowest common denominator? The basest, crassest, most destructive behavior is the end result of everything highbrow. Being brought up by liberal parents, TV, public schools etc. has taught me this. And I'm twice this young lady's age (45) and I see women my own age with all the attributes she describes of her college dorm mates, only now they have children, sometimes grandchildren, who they've passed them onto.
Sickening.

Jacqui said (December 4, 2015):

Dear Eli,

There is nothing wrong with waiting for the right man to fall in love with and getting married with him. Don't let anyone tell you you should do what they are doing.
The day will come that they will see the errors of the way they have been behaving. No real man wants to marry a "slut". They want a decent, loving woman to be his wife and the mother of his children.Women like you should be cherished!

Anon said (December 4, 2015):

I just read Eli’s article. I would say to her, Eli, consider reading the New Testament. In that you will find words of real life. This month is the 20th anniversary of me reading those life changing words for the first time. Before I read that book I was the guy that lived for the lifestyle she describes in college. After, I see there is a whole new life available that God wants to lavish on us. If there is no God, therefore there should be no consequences , so fornicate your brains out. But, if there is a God that says that lifestyle will lead to death, Eli is leading the right life. I hope and pray she stays the course. The trouble is, where are the good men that would appreciate her. In proverbs it says a man like that are one in a thousand. I hope she finds a good man.

FS said (December 4, 2015):

Please lt her know she isnt the only one
Suffering this scourge. I sent her article to my daughter..who could have written this article. My prayers go out to her and my daughter..but there are men that are virgins too..and are feeling the same scourge..my prayers also to the young men.. and my prayer is that they both find each other..we need them for the next generations.

lex said (December 4, 2015):

I clearly remember having condoms literally thrown in both mine and my peers' face from the stage during an assembly for our freshman orientation a decade ago. We were also divided into small groups (more like cadres) and given instruction by our RA's about the harmfulness of "bullying" (of course the REAL topic was the acceptance of homosexuality). I know my experience is not unique, and we all know (thanks the the recent endless stream of news pouring out of our "progressive" campuses) that it is getting worse- on every level. Finding datable women with traditional values like the author of this piece was so difficult and what was available was so horrendous that I was turned off by Western women completely and got as far away as I could. And I never looked back.

Glen said (December 4, 2015):

All one needs to do is study history to find this is nothing new. The like minded cabbalist Jews were doing the very same thing to the wonderful city of Berlin in the 1930's. There were live sex shows on stage. Mother and daughters were both thrown into prostitution as means of survival. The pornography business was booming. Every form of vile and degenerate sex act was available to those who wished to indulge. Berlin had become the new Sodom and Gomorrah, and it was all made possible by the Jew backed communist.

With the Deutschmark holding the same value as wall paper, people from all over the world could come to Berlin and indulge in their wildest, perverted fantasies for next to nothing. It was a sewer plain and simple, all brought on by a devastated economy.

When a certain man arrived on the scene, the problem of Berlin was handled in very short order. The pornographers were booted and the brothels all shut down. This very same man was accused of being a "book burner" when he threw all the books from the porno shops into the street and burned them.

So funny it is less than a hundred years later we in America are experiencing the very same thing as those folks from not so long ago Berlin experienced, and it is being promoted by the very same Communist Jews. You'd think we'd learn..