March 21, 2019
(not him)
Letter from Brian
Henry, I'm struggling at the moment. Last night I was at yet another group in my city, this time a Christian group, where I had wanted to get encouragement and help.
In all of these groups, two things come out. The Jews are God's chosen and must be blessed not cursed. Secondly, Jews are a persecuted people and must be pitied. They use God's words to Abraham as a mantra (I will bless those who bless you and curse those who curse you.). To all of these Christians, it's like rolling through rosary beads every morning. It guarantees that their day will go well. There is no thought of what the words "bless" and "curse" really means. And white nationalism=white supremacy.
With the non-Christian self-help groups I attend, their thing is this. I like Trump, therefore, I must be hated.
It doesn't matter where I turn, I'm ostracized. And I have a renter whom I'm convinced is from some kind of occult background. I have never met such an empty shell of a person. The problem is this - the shell is strong. He walks around perfectly manicured with sunglasses on (and earplugs/headphones in his ears) and works part-time (he has gone through many jobs) while continuing to depend on the government.
At home, he plays mindless computer games and listens to music sometimes 24/7. He would have the a/c on all the time for the thrum of the sound but I've stopped that. He will not answer any questions about his life and if I ask he shouts back (in anxiety) so loud all of the neighbours hear. He does not respond at all to overtures of friendship but instead reacts. He is determined to depend on the government all of his life and maintain a regulated but humdrum life of deadness. There are many "dead" people in our society who are being rescued by the government who never have to face their fears and problems.
The end result is that I'm very lonely. There is a group in a near-by city, a self-help group, that I want to visit again because, though it is far away, I can talk to the leader about anything and he will accept me. It's a Christian addiction group. I would actually like to move out there this summer.
Your website is an essential part of my social life. Thank you.
